A Retreat from Decency - FAQ

You guys. It's been a really long time since we got together. How are you? New job treating you well? What's that, you've been there for five years? Oh, well congrats on that then. I guess you and James (John? Jason? Javier?) are probably enjoying that bump in your personal economy. I'm sure you all had a lovely wedding. When are the kids getting here? Ha! I kid, I kid. No pressure, obviously. Wait, what? You and Jacob have been divorced for 3 years? Well, that's a shame. Can't say I didn't see it coming, though. I did tell you he was kind of a loser that one time. Oh, I didn't tell you that? Oops.

It's been longer than I thought. We should rectify the situation by you coming to our show. We know you probably have questions, too. Keep reading to find your answers and comment if you have a question we didn't address.

The Chupacabra Conspiracy Presents:

A Retreat from Decency

Frequently Asked Questions

1.       When are you having a show?

Funny you should ask. We are having one in less than two weeks. It will be on the Mainstage theater at 7pm at The People’s Improv Theater on 24^th between Park and Lexington. 

2.       Will there be short form improv?

Yes. Short form improv is how we became acquainted in the first place but it’s been awhile since we performed it for an audience. Consider this a return to our roots.

3.       Will there be sketch comedy?

Yes. Sketch comedy is our bread and butter.

4.       Will there be long form improv?

Yes. We have been working on this aspect of our comedy repertoire for some time and hope to treat you to a hearty belly laugh or two.

5.       Will there be shapeshifting robots?

No. You are probably thinking of the Transformers movie franchise, which features Transformers: robots in disguise. I think a new one came out earlier in the summer starring Mark Wahlberg as the new Shia LaBeouf. You may have missed the boat on productions involving shapeshifting robots.

6.       Are you following the US Open?

No. Frankly, I’m not entirely sure how tennis works. What I know is that beautiful people use a snowshoe to swat at a fuzzy, green ball and there are games, sets, and matches but I don’t know in which order and how many of each.

7.       Am I invited?

Yes. Everyone is invited. Please find a list of who is invited below:

·         You

·         Your friends

·         Your mom

·         Everyone

The last bullet point is a catch-all for anyone I missed. This could be your dad. Or your bartender. It includes everyone.

8.       Why are you all making such unpleasant faces in that photo?

How do I put this delicately? Helen farted while we were taking pictures. This is why we can’t have nice things.

A Very Chupacabra Chrismahanukkah

Hi All! We're having a special holiday event tomorrow (Monday, 12/9) and everyone in the whole world is invited. Please come celebrate the holidays (most notably Hanukkah and Christmas) with us. We promise we'll make you laugh. Plus it's cheap. Plus we're collecting toys for needy kids. So if that all wasn't enough to lure you to the PIT, I don't know what will be.

Happy holidays from your friends at the Chupacabra Conspiracy!

Find info on our show here!

Buy tickets here!

New Show Announcement!

We had another packed house at this year's New York City Sketch Festival. It was probably the best show we've done yet, not to mention the fact that our co-performers, Mrs. Peanut were fantastic. So thanks to everyone who came out for that!

In other exciting news, we have another show at the PIT that we're calling A Very Chupacabra Chrismahanukkah. We're excited about the upcoming holiday season and you should be, too. You can check out the details and get yourself some tickets here!

TWO Shows this Week

You have not one, but TWO opportunities to catch the Chupacabras in all their hilarious glory. I know, I know. You probably just want me to tell you when and where both shows are so that you can determine which is most convenient for you to attend.

Consider this: perhaps you should attend both. It's just a suggestion. A strong, strong suggestion. Without further ado, here are the details:

The Bucket Show at Ryan's Daughter

Thursday, 10/3

8:30pm

FREE

The Bucket Show at Ryan's Daughter - New York, NY ... - Facebook

BOOM. It's free! All you have to do is pony up for some booze. I mean, unless you don't want booze. We don't judge here. Might write a sketch about it, but we don't judge.

PIT Sketch Fest

People's Improv Theater

Saturday, 10/5

2:00pm

$8

TICKETS

It's not free but it is reasonable. And the PIT sells booze! So if you're up for spending a little extra money, you can come to the show buzzed. Sounds like a nice little Saturday afternoon, if you ask me.

Welcome, Sue!

Ladycabras, Gentlecabras,

It is with great pleasure that the Chupacabra Conspiracy welcomes its newest member into the fold. Sue O'Doherty is a phenomenal improviser, professional actor and overall cool cat. We're very excited that she's joined us, particularly as we have new performances on the horizon.

What's that, you say? You didn't know about our performances? It's okay. We'll forgive you for being out of the loop and I'll elaborate a little bit in upcoming posts. Back to business.

This is Sue Time and don't you forget it. Here's some information on her background, for your browsing pleasure:

Sue O'Doherty is an improviser, actor and singer who has studied at Chicago City Limits, Magnet, and HB. She promises to keep studying until she gets it right. She is a world class screamer whose dance moves have been known to clear entire clubs. She is also a clinical psychologist who specializes in helping clients unblock their own creativity.

Okay, fine. Here's a more serious picture.

Chupacabras at Broadway Comedy Club

You read right, my lovelies. The Chupacabra Conspiracy will be performing at the Broadway Comedy Club next Wednesday, June 12th as part of the Chicago City Limits Improv Jam. Don't be fooled by the show title, though. Our main game is sketch comedy, and we plan to play it hard.

On the fence about going? Look what Charlie's Mom has to say about it:

He is a mensch

So there you have it. I promise you'll get some chuckles out of the deal, but if you're a perpetual grump who doesn't care about things like laughing or having fun, you can look forward to cheap respite from this heat. Check out the deets:

What: Chicago City Limits Improv Jam

When: Wednesday, June 12th, 7:30pm

Where: Broadway Comedy Club on 53 between 8 and 9

Cost: $5

All the Chupacabras hope to see you there!

Upcoming Show!

We at the Chupacabra Conspiracy have been too quiet for too long. That's why I'm pleased to announce (to all five of you) that we're having a show!

Where: Ryan's Daughter
When: 3/21, 9:00pm
Why: It's high time

In case you're not sufficiently enticed by the prospect of your favorite Chupacabras performing some sketch comedy in a locale where you can simultaneously consume alcohol, how's this for extra incentive:

The show will feature

ALL

NEW

MATERIAL

Now, I know what you're thinking.

"What?"

"No!"

"Too good to be true!"

"This is the best thing to happen to me since lunchtime, when I found a bag of Doritos hanging precariously from the vending machine and I hip checked them down."

You bet your bruised hip it is. So come to Ryan's Daughter for hooch and haha's.